Upsetting
Monday, January 05, 2004
 
She will not again be traveling to the great cities of the world: San Francisco, Florence, Tokyo. At least, she will not visit those places with him.

She has fired him, she tells her friends, because she is no longer impressed by him. It may seem a small, needy demand of someone – to be impressed – but it really isn’t, she says.

I will depart if you do not impress me.

She says this does not mean what have you done for me lately. No, not at all, because forms of impression may last for years, some may indelibly pressed into the mind and heart. The shelf life of these impressions, rather than their frequency, is what is important.

At this stage of her life, she is not impressed by him. Maybe he wore off.

She admired his discipline and fitness regimen, but she was put off when he told her – without pause – he had been dutifully (no pun intended on either of their part) keeping a log of bowel movements. Stool schedules, he said, were important. Three, well-formed, daily expulsions.

And coming during a midnight drink in Chinatown, his revelation came just three hours after dinner. In her mind, he practically told him while they were eating. And inside she didn’t really dispute the necessity of a man paying mind to such things, but she felt it was a private matter. Like how they say women should wipe from front to back, it doesn’t take a whole lot of explaining.

She is fit, too, but she is not nearly as forthcoming. And though she feels the attention from the men in the gym, she is not firing him for them. It’s for her, the only person that it should be done for. Maybe a little for him, too, since deep down he probably knows that someone else out there would not only accept his way of thinking, they would actually think along his lines.

Like the incessant harping about how no one wants to talk about the Saudi connection. A long time ago she liked how at dinner parties he would describe the kingdom as an 800-pound hippo, unknowingly screwing up the expression.

But not anymore. She's heard it all too often, way more than he would like the Saudi-Texas connection to be mentioned. It’s run it’s course, and the material has become stale.

So she is firing him.

Life moves on, and you gotta keep moving, they say.
 
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