Billets-doux to my 2002 Fantasy Baseball World Series champions
3B – Scott Rolen, Phillies-Cardinals
– Though your fantasy output was sometimes inconsistent this year, you have the honor of finishing the season as my favorite player. To endure toss-bag Larry Bowa fucking with you by changing your spot in the order every day and calling you out in the paper is a feat few men could accomplish without being charged with a felony. Your final va fanculo
to the fans of Philadelphia – a group whose sports ignorance is legendary – by not taking a curtain call was brilliant and heroic.
And then with the way you finished the season in St. Louis, I couldn’t be happier or more proud. You deserve all your future successes in the Gateway City.