Because I got slammed in the face last week and I now have night-vision issues in my right eye, I went to the optometrist this morning to see if I detached a retina or dislodged the flap that seals my laser-corrected cornea. In order for the good doctor to determine the extent of the damage to my right eye, it was necessary to dilate the pupil in only that eye.
As a result, I now look like this
But I'm going to be okay, the doctor said. My night vision might be forever fucked, but my retina appears to be in fine fettle.